Natural Feelings
by Shadowgate
Summary: Takes place after "The Magic Bush."


Natural Feelings

By Shadowgate

…...

During the Tucker Family's car ride home the two children had much to say.

Craig said "I'll tell you mom you have no idea how much I wanted to pick up my chair and slam it in that singer's face."

Laura replied "well Craig a lot of good that would have done. The police would have been called and you would have gone to juvenile hall for assault. Plus I wouldn't have been able to stop the police from arresting you nor would I have tried."

Craig said "right and you handled it well. I figured this was one of the times where the adults could and would handle the problem. That's not to say kids in this town don't solve problems when you have some adults that are too stupid to. However be ending up in handcuffs for assaulting that idiot wouldn't have helped you mom and I do realize that."

Ruby commented "a police officer's handcuffs are shiny and metal."

Craig said "oh and then had I been arrested for assault then my little sister would have said 'oh Craig those are pretty shiny wrist bracelets you're wearing."

Laura said "oh that would have made for a great Tucker Family moment."

Thomas starts giggling and Laura snaps "Thomas stop giggling at that it's not funny and if that had been how our night ended you sure as hell wouldn't have laughed."

Ruby said "first of all it wouldn't have been funny because that's not what I would have said had Craig ended up in handcuffs. Craig just suggested I would have said that to be a smart ass. What I would have actually said in that situation would NOT have made for a great Tucker Family moment." 

Laura responded "Ruby don't say smart ass."

Craig said "well she sure told me."

Thomas replied "that's what girls do to their big brothers."

Craig replied "right it's natural for a little sister to be mean if they're big brother does something wrong. Just like it was natural of me to want to kick the crap out of that singer on behalf of my mom."

Laura said "well natural or not had you done it we would have been in deep shit."

Thomas replied "yes but honey you're missing his point that it's natural for a son to want to defend his mother just like you choosing not to shave is natural."

Craig and Ruby groaned and Craig said "please dad not in front of my little sister."

Ruby commented "A son doesn't need to hear about his mom's private parts even if that's where he came from."

Laura snapped "Ruby!"

Thomas said "alright now you two kids need to settle down."

Laura said "well Thomas she makes a good point."

Craig said "speaking of those who shouldn't have heard or seen that which is in question it sure was nice of two out of three to confess."

Laura responded "yes that showed they have some character."

Thomas said "it became obvious all three were guilty after they made that video."

(Flashback to the dinner gathering!)

Butters said to Cartman "let's confess anyhow."

Kenny called out from another table "let's go ahead and confess. I'm surprised Kyle didn't turn us in."

Butters and Kenny drag Cartman over to the Tucker's table.

Butters said "Craig I'm sorry but I along with Kenny and fat ass did it. We've been ready to confess for a while. Cartman and I got the drone out of my garage. Then I met him in his room and Kenny was there."

Cartman said "don't call me a fat ass and I've not been ready to confess. Hey look on the bright side I managed to get all the drones to crash in the woods."

Butters said "yes but that still won't get Mrs. Tucker's picture offline."

Cartman grumbled and walked off.

Butters said "well two out of the three of us have been ready to confess and take our punishments."

Steven yelled "well Butters you went behind my back and used the drone after all. But since Cartman was your influence I'll ground you for just three days instead of a couple of weeks."

Kenny stated "I wonder what my punishment will be for doing this?"

Carol McCormick shouted "well your father and I can come up with something for sure."

Ruby stood up and asked "hey Kenny how would you feel if someone put a picture of your mom's bare private area on the internet?"

Kenny answered "I wouldn't feel good about that. If a picture of my mom's bush was posted on the internet that would remind me that my dad would do anything to get money for alcohol."

Stuart snapped "I would not post your mom's picture to some website just get money for alcohol Kenny."

Carol snapped "I'll bet you would you stupid piece of dear turd."

Stuart snapped "shut up bitch!"

Carol and Stuart started beating each other up.

Ruby said "well I'm sorry I asked that question."

Kenny said "don't be sorry it was a smart and bold question and Craig should be proud of you for asking that."

Craig said "I'm proud of her for asking but I'm pissed off at the way you were able to side step it and the focus became your parents and not you."

Kenny said "you're right Craig that smart ass answer of mine really shifted everything. Craig and Ruby I'm sorry for the torment you two have had to put up with because of Butters and I along with that fat fuck Eric Cartman chose to do."

(Back to present car ride home.)

Thomas said "alright kids we're home and you two need to get ready for bed."

The Tucker Family went into their house and their kids got cleaned up and went to bed.

THE END


End file.
